Lost!

"Mom!" I heard a quiet voice say. Thinking it was a dream, I snuggled under my covers even deeper and settled in.

I get home from work at about five o'clock in the morning. After winding down a little bit by reading a novel, I fell asleep at about 5:30. Needless to say, I was sleeping GOOD by seven. Then, I heard it again. “Mom”. It was like a loud whisper filled with desperation and fear. I rolled over and said, “What?”

“I got up to get a drink of water and I looked in on the snakes and George is missing!” We have three ball pythons, Neo, the oldest and largest, Oscar, who is almost full-grown, and George, a six-month-old baby. Neo was our first, bought for Abby Christmas of 2009. Oscar is Paul's, but we are snake sitting indefinitely. George is mine. I bought him October 5 as a birthday present to myself. I have wanted a baby since we got Neo and when I saw them on sale for 60% off, I couldn't pass him up.

George and I have gotten quite attached, although I think I am a little more attached than he is. I know it is hard for you to hear me talk about snakes in such a loving tone. I am a little different, but then y'all knew that. If it helps you comprehend it, imagine George is a puppy. Or a gerbil. Or whatever animal you like. I love George and when Abby said he was missing, I jumped up out of bed and rushed into the living room.

Snakes seek out warmth and darkness, so we searched every warm, dark spot we could think of. George is so tiny that his head is about half the size of my thumb! He is eighteen inches long and about as thick as a Sharpie! We looked under the couch, the chair, the ottoman. No George!

We searched with flashlights under and around the stove, the refrigerator, the washer, the dryer. No George!

We took Neo and Oscar out and set them on the living room floor thinking maybe they could lead us to him. Where would they go? Maybe that's where George was. Snakes are nocturnal, though, and at seven-thirty in the morning, they just want to sleep. I'm right there with you, guys, but we have to find George. They didn't care and went straight into the terrarium.

We spent an hour looking everywhere for George before I sat on the couch. I didn't know where else to look. We knew he had to be in the house somewhere. It was twenty-eight degrees outside with six inches of snow on the ground and more falling. He wouldn't have gone out there.

Thoughts invaded my mind. I thought maybe he had gotten himself tangled up in the coils behind the refrigerator and burned himself. Maybe he was hurt and scared. He is just a six-month-old baby! He isn't prepared for the dangers in the jungle we call a house.

I began to pray as the first tear slipped down my cheek. “Lord, You know where George is. Please lead me to him.” I felt an overwhelming urge to look in the couch I was sitting on. We removed all of the cushions. No George!

Then I remembered that the interfacing under the couch was hanging a little on the one side, so Abby and I flipped the couch on its back. There in the corner, inside the couch, right under where I was sitting, a little brown head!

“GEORGE!” I ripped the interfacing out of the way, reached in and pulled him out. I was so relieved! I was so happy! I held him tightly and told him how badly he had scared us. I told him that I was so happy that I had found him, I couldn't even be mad at him for getting out and hiding. I wasn't mad at all. I was overjoyed!

As I sat down and hugged him tightly, I thought, “This is how God feels! This is the overwhelming joy that God experiences when He finds us!”

In Luke 15:3-10 Jesus uses a lost sheep and a lost coin to illustrate this exact thing. I have read those stories a million times, but until my baby was lost I never really personalized this story. I felt the devastation and grief at the thought that I might never see him alive again. I felt the joy of holding him in my arms when I found him. I wasn't thinking about Neo and Oscar at that point. I was celebrating my relationship with George.

God loves us so much more than I love that little snake. God mourns and grieves when we are lost. He looks everywhere for us. He searches for us relentlessly. If you have wandered away, or if you have never been found, you don't need to hide from God. He isn't searching for you so that He can punish you. He is searching for you because he loves you and He knows the dangers that you are exposing yourself to that you don't even see lurking in the shadows.

George was right there the whole time. He was right in the couch. He was less than a foot away from me. But he didn't come out. He remained hidden. I don't know why he did, but I know that when I have sinned and I know God is looking for me I sometimes remain hidden, too. Shame, fear, safety of the secret place, etc. make it easier to hide than to face the consequences. I don't realize what danger is lurking just behind me.

You see, Satan is also looking for you. “Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a lion, seeking someone to devour.” I Peter 5:8.

One of them, God or Satan, will find you. Which one will you allow it to be? Are you going to be like George and keep hiding in the dark places just out of God's sight? Or will you come into the light and be held, coddled, and loved?

“I tell you that in the same way, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance... In the same way, I tell you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” Luke 15:7, 10.

Help Dealing with Consequences of Sin

I was doing my devotions the other day and God spoke something to me loudly and clearly. Now, I have to admit I have been struggling with a certain sin and every time I fall, I confess it and repent, but I don't “feel” forgiven. I feel dirty and guilty. I know that usually means I have to forgive myself. I don't feel comfortable praying for help in dealing with the consequences of it. I feel like “I got myself into this boat and it isn't right or fair to ask God to help me through this.

I was reading Jacob's story. He had stolen his brother Esau's birthright. Esau threatened to kill Jacob so he fled. He ran back to the land of Abraham's family where he spent fourteen years working for his uncle. At the end of the fourteen years, Jacob wanted to return to the land of Canaan, where his father had settled. He sent servants along with some flocks to offer Esau as a gift—a peace offering.

Genesis 32:6-12 “After delivering the message, the messengers returned to Jacob and reported, 'We met your brother, Esau, and he is already on his way to meet you—with an army of 400 men!' 7 Jacob was terrified at the news. He divided his household, along with the flocks and herds and camels, into two groups. 8 He thought, 'If Esau meets one group and attacks it, perhaps the other group can escape.' 9 Then Jacob prayed, 'Oh, God of my grandfather Abraham, and God of my father Isaac—Oh Lord, you told me 'Return to your own land and to your relatives.' And you promised me, 'I will treat you kindly.' 10 I am not worthy of all the unfailing love and faithfulness you have shown to me, your servant. When I left home and crossed the Jordan River, I owned nothing except a walking stick. Now my household fills two large camps! Oh, Lord, please rescue me from the hand of my brother, Esau. I am afraid that he is coming to attack me, along with my children. 12 But you promised me, 'I will treat you kindly, and I will multiply your descendants until they become as numerous as the sands along the seashore—too many to count.'”

One of the things that really jumped out at me in this passage is that Jacob didn't even bring up the sin he had committed which was the cause of Esau's attack. Despite our sin, God has a plan for each and every one of us. We cannot allow that sin to stand in the way of God's plan. Once you have confessed and repented of your sin, move on. God has removed that sin from you as far as the east is from the west. Yes, there may be lingering consequences, but God is ready and willing to help you deal with those consequences so that you can move on to your destiny.

We sang a song in church on Sunday that confirmed what I had learned in my quiet time with God the day before. A few lines from the song stuck in my spirit. “If grace is an ocean, we're all drowning... I don't have time to maintain regrets when I think about how you love me! Oh, how you love me! Oh, how you love me! Oh, how you love!”

Thank you, Lord for your unfailing love and mercy! Thank you for assisting me with the consequences of my sins instead of expecting me to fight the fight alone. Thank you for always coming to my rescue regardless of what I have done to get myself in this situation.